Monday, September 28, 2015

Don't Let IVF Ruin Your Relationship

Brought to you by SimpleRx


(Image source: Monash.edu)
So you have made the decision to have a baby but have arrived at IVF to make your family dreams come true. Trying for a baby, whether naturally or through in-vitro fertilization (IVF), can have a major impact on your relationship, testing the bonds between even the strongest and longest relationships. How much will depend mostly on you as an individual, as well as you as a couple.



IVF is an extremely complicated medical procedure and will have different results for each couple. It is not a procedure undertaken lightly and you will have to discuss it with your doctors to determine whether it is the right step for you. It is especially important that you both look at the statistics of IVF and approach the subject with eyes wide open. IVF has helped millions of couples each year all around the world, but it is worth noting that it doesn’t always work for every couple. The stress of attempting to fall pregnant can sometimes have a devastating effect on some couples, leaving them not only without a much-longed-for child, but without their partner’s either.

Stand Together as a Couple

When you both have agreed that a baby would make your family complete and IVF is the way to do this, then the first step is to talk to each other. Complicated medical procedures such as IVF will cause some emotional upheavals and it is important that both of you discuss how far you will go to have a baby. IVF is incredibly intrusive and may be too much for some. Discuss other options such as adoption beforehand to ensure that you are both on the same wavelength.

Financial planning is a must when considering IVF. The costs associated through multiple treatments, as required, can place serious stress on any relationship, especially if you don’t have a lot of money put aside.

Do you think you will be able to face the procedure as a strong, united couple? Undertaking IVF will mean several visits to the hospital for some invasive questions and tests. Not only will you be talking to strangers about your body and your lives, but also you will be expected to take certain tests to determine sperm and egg viabilities. Whilst one may be quite eager to take the tests, the other may be hesitant.

Even the strongest and happiest of couples may find that arguments occur. Talk to each other; tell each other how you are feeling and your fears. If this isn’t enough, then professional counseling may be the ideal way to go.

IVF will have major effects on the woman’s body. For the first half of her menstrual cycle, she will be taking fertility drugs. Egg extraction can be incredibly painful; giving a sperm sample can be invasive and actually taking sperm from the testes can be just as painful as egg extraction. Waiting to see if your eggs have been fertilized and ready to be implanted is often said to be the hardest thing to do. Make this time go quicker by keeping busy.

Make Sure You Have Support

Support is vital in any relationship, particularly when going through IVF treatment. Undertaking this type of procedure normally means that conception cannot be done through conventional means. As such, one partner may be feeling guilty that they haven’t been able to give their partner a baby the ‘normal’ way. Your ability, or inability, to produce a child can have a great effect on the way you see yourself. If the problem comes from the man, reassure him that he is still a man and if it is the woman, reassure her that she is still the perfect woman.

The side effects of fertility drugs can make women feel moody and men can feel as though they can’t do anything right. Pain can make things much worse so try and arrange extra time off work or getting some help in.

Help is Just a Phone Call Away

If things are getting a little too strained for comfort, then perhaps professional counseling is what you need. Many fertility doctors will have a list of counselors who can help you work through your anxieties or join a support group where you can talk about your fears with couples who are dealing with the same issues.




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