Tuesday, February 23, 2010

Soo what to write about?

I havent really written in a while... The past 2 weeks have really been a roller coaster for me.. Both mentally, and physically... Walls got broken that had no business being broken. And medical issues that I didnt know too much about attacked me. All within the same time. Havent been sleeping. Im just.... Ugh. Tired... Between now having to take chris back and forth to work - which wasnt a problem before - to now also having to either take or get eric - depending on chris schedule.. Its hard tho, when chris gets off at midnight... Having to wake eric up. Not cool. But I guess, oh well. ?   Oh, and doctor appointments, let me tell you... Horrible.. Chris work schedule changes week to week. its not steady like it used to be b/c hes back up for dairy and in training to be department manager for dairy. So they schedule him for mornings alot lately.. Ugh. Not fun. Im trying to balance everything, and I cant do it. See, for those who aint clued in, I had help. Not no more.. Nope. No warning. Oh well, I guess right... Funny thing is tho... That person (who shall remain nameless) claims to want to go out and blah blah blah.... However - when she first moved in, she stated time and time and time and time again that she LOVES to be at home. Curled up with a good book or movie.  Whatever. She would rather do the same thing she did here - sit on the computer, and play on facebook - sorority life, farmville, etc etc... Stupid status updates. Give it all away... Oh well. traded kid for dog and cat. Traded bed for couch..      But again, whatever.

Funny tho... Me and my husband has been getting along great. better than we have in a few months... wonder why?  its great. Granted, our wedding anniversary has been ruined. Had to cancel our trip to Vegas. But we hope we can make it later in the year..... But still...

Anyways... My mom is coming over tomorrow (wed) for a few hours. I have my foot doc appt at 2pm, and chris will be at work. So no one to get or watch eric. Aint no way in hell I am gonna take him to the foot doc with me.. they will be doing xrays and what not (they do them in office).  So imma get eric outta school at like 1 and mom will be here around 115. I gotta leave here at like 130. Imma show mom how to play the Wii. I know she will love bowling on it.. She hasnt bowled in forever. Mostly b/c of her back... Eric Im sure will show her Mario lol.   Im hoping that the doc will be able to see whats wrong with my foot... Teaches me to land on the ball of my foot when jumping out of a truck lol...  Oh well.

Ahh,.. what else is new?   Oh - I applied for a part time, independent contractor job, that wont interfere with my driving cab. which is cool. It starts around april/may. simple stuff, stuff I know how to do. Excited. Already had an interview. They will be figuring out who will be doing 2nd interviews within the next week or two. That will def help us out...

Alright... Well,  Im going to get off here. Eric is playing Mario on the Wii, and needs help at the castle lol.

For those of you viewing via email - come to the site and check it out... changed the layout and colors and what not, plus, i want the page views lol....



The penguin shines across the loving hydrogen.

 i know.

Thursday, February 18, 2010

A few things, and a letter...........

I dont even know how to start right now... Im just so, pissed, irritated, infuriated, aggravated. If I would have known this would happen, then I wouldnt have just gone so far in pain. I wouldnt have wasted money that I dont have. Ive never asked for anything. EVER. And you wanna compare me to your mother? I dont think so! Your mother asked you every other day if you had a job and were gonna pay for this that and the other. You wanted out, thats why you spent so much time at my house. I talked my husband into letting you move in. You said you would take my son to and from school and do the dishes, as to earn your keep... I never made u get a job, never made u do anything. If you did anything around the house or whatever that was on you. I never asked. Unless of course u said you would do it, then didnt do it. I wish I would have kept a tab this past year to show you exactly how much...All those times, either going for breakfast, or stopping on the way home from somewhere, when my husband said not to, but I still did it anyways. Bought for you, gave for you. But didnt think nothing of it. You were my friend. at least thats what I thought.... I didnt think twice when I was out at walmart and you saw the pajama pants and wanted them, even tho I know i shouldnt have, I did anyways. When your mom turned off your phone, and accidentally texted u/called u and sounded excited about it, I gave u my phone to use. Never asked u for help financially or otherwise.

Is it really too hard to talk to me? Give me a warning? Funny thing is, Chris knew this would happen.. He had a feeling that something bad was gonna happen once we got back.... I should have noticed when the day after we get back u stayed in the room all day.  No, I should have noticed when you started spending more time at my families house than I do.

And to think that my in laws really cared for you. Pfft.  They welcomed you into the family with open arms. You said you never had that before. Well, I guess you are willing to give it up super easily...

U know, last I checked, friends are supposed to be open with each other. Friends are supposed to talk. Anytime I had any kind of problem, I told you.  but apparently, u cant talk to me...

How can u do to me what we did to your mom? Basically, thats what happened!

I dont understand how MY OWN FAMILY would aid in this. Instead of being smart and telling u to talk to me, they tell u to move in.

So whats gonna happen when ur tired of being there? When ur tired of ur allergies acting up? When ur tired of doing for her exactly what u did here - minus the child?!

Its funny tho..... I should have seen it coming. I should have felt it coming.... U did me dirty, kinda like how you said Christy did you dirty....

i dont trust easily.
this is why.
I give my all to make it possible for you to stay rent free, money free, not having to worry about anything,.... and this is what i get?

I'm so disappointed. 

Funny thing is.... Now when I get procedures done, such as shots in my back, or some other kind of procedure, whos gonna drive me back if I cant? I gotta call my mom now I guess, and schedule my shit around her.

I got so much more to say... but Im not.. Im gonna relax. All this stress is killing me right now... im in so much pain....mentally and physically.... this stupid cyst is doing god knows what - and the stress is making it worse....     Oh well i guess, right?


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